Wednesday I had an opportunity to visit with a dear friend from high school. I had always respected and liked this friend, you know who you are. As we talked I found that the perception I had of her high school years were very different from hers, and vice versa. I thought she was popular and without problems, and she thought the same of me. Unfortunately, not the truth. We both had been bullied in high school by the same group of people. Now we were not beaten up , but life was not pleasant. We were always the butt of someones joke, treated like we were the dirt wiped of someones shoe, and either ignored or played practical jokes on. And you know who you are, or maybe not. You see, as young adolescents we are so vulnerable to our peers because we want acceptance and love. We don’t understand why we are being treated this way and I wonder if our attackers realize the scars they leave. Oh the scars are there and they are called insecure, low self-esteem, and for some depression. So I wonder, if we knew how our actions affected others, would we change them… as we get older do we continue to treat adults like we treated our adolescent friends? I certainly hope we can grow up.
As we talked we both seemed to have the same feelings regarding these people, forgiveness. Yet we are continued to be treated by them in the same manner in most cases.
I have recently been gathering some friends from high school for monthly breakfasts, we call it the divine order of the ya,ya betcha breakfast club. It is so fun to get together with these women who have indeed grown up. The group is non exclusive, everyone is welcome. We talk about out lives and families, we do not focus on ( I’m not giving away my age) a few years back…a lot of years back 🙂 After all, those days are behind us. If we keep looking backwards we are bound to miss some awesome things in front of us. So as graduation is upon us for many of our children, I hope you will share this little piece of advice.
Don’t assume that the person sitting next to you has a golden life, cut them some slack and give them compassion. You only see what people want you to see and that will never include their insecurities. If you think you have hurt someone, go to them and ask their forgiveness, I think you will be glad you did. If you are holding anger or bitterness toward someone, let it go. It only hurts you and will grow like a cancer in you and tear you apart. And last but not least, use the golden rule in your life, “Do onto others as you would want them to do unto you.” My Dad always said… You need to be more like thumper, when Bambi called the skunk flower everyone laughed. So thumper said. ” If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all!” This is something I will never forget.
And finally, if there is anyone who is reading this and I have done an injustice to, please forgive my ignorance. I’ve been there and shame on me! I always try to have Jesus mentality, he came to Love and Forgive, and that is what we are called to as well. Regardless of your beliefs in spirituality, it is a good way to live. Have a wonderful weekend. Blessings